Stir Things Up

I didn't mean to wait all week to write a journal. And I'm supposed to be meeting Wes at Quality 16 to watch the Hobbit tomorrow at 11:45. Which means I need to wake up before eleven. I'll probably set my alarm to eleven o'clock and be out the door in twenty minutes. It's what I tend to do.

Buuut, before I get to that, I have to try and remember Monday up until now to the best of my abilities. This is why I write journals. Because I can't remember this shit. So I read back on what I wrote. It works wonders, I tell ya.

So Monday ... um. Oh!

I had my Calculus class on Monday. I really didn't want to go in, because we weren't actually going to have a class. We'd taken the final the week before, so what else would we learn? It would be pointless. I parked in the parking garage, shamelessly searching out Nate's car as I drove up the levels (didn't see it, by the way), and was in the class for a total of ten minutes. I got one of the questions wrong on the first two pages, which I thought was guaranteed 100% (I forgot a pi symbol), but the others were fine. I ended up with a B in that class overall. Satisfied, I handed my final back to the instructor and went straight back to the parking garage.

So then I was left with plenty of time before I had to go to work. I know I enjoyed working Mondays before, but now I feel like they're getting a little ridiculous. But I'm not there yet. So, instead of going home, I did some errands. I filled up my car, since gas has been relatively cheap lately, stopped at Lowes and got my dad his Christmas present. Which means that I'm done with Christmas shopping. I stopped by at Chelsea, picking up a job application for that place, but then ... when I filled most of it out, I kind of decided that maybe I didn't really want this job. I ended up throwing the application away later this week. After that, I think I went straight home. And watched an episode of Doctor Who. Surprise, right?

I had to go to work at five, though. Which is the usual. And, of course, we were short one person. I totally forget who was working beyond that. Nate, of course. Erich, definitely. You know I would remember Nate being there. Owen, maybe? I dunno. We had a whole bunch of problems with who would be prepping what and who would be cleaning what again. I'm kind of getting sick of this. It's a very big problem we have with Erich when we're short. It really shouldn't be.

(Thankfully I don't have to worry about that on my weekends.)

Um. That's about all I remember.

Tuesday, I got up early, as per usual. I went to the lab, had a party with the machine that helped measure ... um ... the point at which a solid sublimates or when a liquid evaporates. What the hell is that word? Jeez. Out of Chemistry for less than a week and I forget everything. What does this tell me about my prospective future?

Anyway, whatever.

Tom was busy setting up the second part of our lab, so I was set to watch our samples disappear. Every time he came over and asked how I was doing, I said we were having a damn good party. He speaks sarcasm as a language. I can reciprocate.

Instead of meeting up with Cara after lab, even though I texted her, I went to the pi hall and pulled out my book. I looked up from the words almost every time I saw someone walk by. I saw Nate and my heart fucking leaped. That wasn't cool. But at the same time, I couldn't take my eyes off of him as he walked by on the other side of the big hole. He didn't even have the bag he had when he drove me to school all those weeks ago. He had a fucking folder in his hands. That's it. A fucking folder. I saw Kevin three times. I must have missed him walk right by me, though. That or he figured out some other way around me. I was kind of pissed off at him. He probably didn't notice me, and I didn't say anything, but ... he didn't say hi or anything. I miss him as a friend. He's probably one of the most pessimistic people I know, but at the same time, he's still my friend. At least in my eyes.

Y'know, I texted him Saturday night/Sunday morning. He never texted me back. Bitch.

But I ended up reading about a hundred pages in the book I was reading before I had to go to Chemistry lecture. Which felt almost pointless. You know what I did instead? I wrote that story that should never reach another's eyes. Although I think I'm convinced that I should post it on Tumblr when I finish it. And hope no one reads it. But at the same time, I don't think I can keep it to myself.

I had problems composing myself, though. I really, really got caught up in that story. Every now and again Eric would poke me or elbow me, and I reacted way too violently. He couldn't read what I was writing. No way in hell.

I don't know what I did between school and work. But I do remember just little points of work.

I got pissed off at Erich. John wanted to leave, so I told Erich that I could take deliveries if Matt couldn't get back in time. Ever since I took that double for Nate, Erich hasn't let me take anything. He said that I couldn't deliver anymore. I asked him if it was because of that one time, and he actually said that was the reason. That instantly set me off. That's already a sore point that won't ever go away. He doesn't need to fucking pick on it. Then he goes and tells me that I'm a manager now, and because of that, I can't deliver. Except I wasn't the manager that night. He was.

I did end up taking a delivery to Loch Alpine, though. But before that, I told him that what he said pissed me off, after we had a little time to brood. Y'know, usually bringing this stuff up and exchanging apologies works out. Especially with him. Instead, he turned around and told me that he didn't care. What did I think I was? Fucking god? Okay, besides the inside joke from high school, that was not funny at all.

I ended up cutting my finger on our chopper thing, too. Before I chopped onions. I couldn't stop the bleeding, either. Not that it was bad or anything. It just wouldn't stop. It slipped, so it wasn't on purpose or anything, but that's the second time that chopper mechanism has drawn blood from my system.

I took Abbi home that day. As soon as I walked in the house, her mom came up to me and handed me money, despite my protests, for bringing Abbi home. I didn't do it because Abbi needed a ride. Which, okay, she does yet. I do it because she's one of the closest friends I have and we tell each other everything. We haven't had a whole lot of time together lately. I finally got to see her room since she decorated it. Dragons. I tell you. I do like dragons.

Am sketching one right now. I'll finish it up, transfer it to Photoshop, blow it up to something nice and sizable, and hopefully print it off as some sort of poster. It's Roiluff, so it's some very goofy pose. But I'm giving Roiluff to Abbi. She needs a bright orange, extremely silly dragon. I kind of find it funny how Roiluff has a personality and Jiagem and Dmundr don't. When Jiagem and Dmundr are my dragons. Even fucking Râgyan has more of a personality than Jiagem and Dmundr. Although I think Dmundr is one of those dragons that puts up a strong front and is more like meh. Whatever. I don't even know. These are supposed to be my characters.

Right. So. Wednesday?

Well, I picked Cara up, I went to my Psychology class. We were presenting today, so my group quickly got together before the instructor came in and figured out what exactly we were doing. I feel like I hardly contributed, but I got a 10 out of 10 anyway. I'm cool with that. At the end of class, one of my groupmates, whom I've seen sketching in class before, asked me if I had a deviantart. I gave her my username, told her it was also my Tumblr name, and we've been following each other on deviantart and Tumblr since. She's a damn good artist, if I don't say so myself. It kind of makes me wish I could finish projects. I haven't done much all year.

After my psych class, I had five and a half hours to kill. So you know what Cara and I did? I brought the movie Wes let me borrow, as long with my laptop, so we started watching it. I had to pause it while Cara went to class, in which case I went to pi hall again (and saw Kevin leave) and killed time. We finished up the movie, and then she told me I had to watch Sherlock. So I did.

Tell ya what. I figured out both mysteries in the movie and the show, before the end. Before Sherlock did. Before the audience was supposed to know in Unusual Suspects. I figured out the mystery in the movie before I even figured out what the mystery was. I know who did it.

Y'know, when I brought my laptop to school, I totally forgot about my composition class. I was very happy to realize that I could type up my final exam rather than having to write it out. I finished the three essays in an hour. Got 100%, just like I expected. Professor Thompson told me that he I didn't cease to amaze him at how quickly I write. He's infatuated with my writing, I swear. XD Anyway, before I left, Carson turned around, smiled at me, and said goodbye. I really wish I would have given him my phone number or something. I don't know if I'll ever see him again. He did this last week, too.

No regerts. Well, I have a regert.

Instead of going home, I went to work. It was about ten past nine when I walked in the door. I told Wes that the sign should be off, and he told me we closed at ten. Oh. Right. I dunno where my brain was. I told him I figured out the movie well before the end, though. I had to brag. It was a very good movie, but I was right! I ended up digging my laptop up from my car and giving him his movie back. Wes almost offered it to Nate straight after, but said he wouldn't until he got whatever Nate already had from him back. I think I'm the only one that gets things straight back to Wes when he lends movies out.

I kinda ignored Nate ... I just didn't really look at him. I noticed he shaved his beard again. I think he's gotten a little chubbier than the last time he did that, but I wasn't going to tell him anything. He got offended when I said he ate a lot at work. Demanded if I was calling him fat. XD I dunno why I do this to him, though. I don't even know if he notices. Which would kind of make me sad if he didn't. I kind of pointedly didn't look at him. Because ... I dunno. Because I've gotten to the point again where I'd probably just leap and give him a big fucking hug if I didn't.

Ohmydear. You know what? I closed with Erich and Nate on Monday. I dunno why I just remember this now. Erich's way of counting money was completely different from my own, and he kept telling me that I was doing things incorrectly. He also told Nate that he could go home early since dishes were done, and I had already swept everything and Erich was going to mop everything. Nate clocked out rather early, but he never left. I think he did end up mopping anyway. He actually stayed at the shop later than both Erich and me. He got in his car when Erich and I were shutting down the building and kind of just idled there, but Erich and I left completely with Nate still sitting there.

He was a great conversationalist that night, actually. He got out his phone and played his music, which distracted me more than anything while I was counting money, but it was rather good music.

Anyway. Thursday, I went to school and took my final exam. It was much, much easier than I thought it would be. After class, I had to wait for Eric to give me back my calculator, and before he was out, Chris passed by me. "That test was scary easy," I told him. He agreed, but he had somewhere to be after a couple sentences. I did well, though. Very well.

I didn't have work, which was weird. So I watched Doctor Who, another episode of Sherlock, and went to bed about eleven.

Oh - Wednesday! I stopped by at Abbi's band concert at the high school before I went back to the shop. My eyes caught on this guy that looked a whole lot like Nate - especially from a distance - and they wouldn't tear away from him. Abbi would probably know exactly who I'm talking about. Which, as if talking about this guy wasn't bad enough, mentioning that one of her classmates resembles him is even worse.

Nate doesn't like me like I like him. I got to let this drop and just be the friends we already are. We're seriously just friends. And that bugs me. At least we're friends. After I told him I liked him, I didn't think that'd ever happen again.

So, after her concert, while I was waiting to meet up with her, I met her grandma and grandpa. Apparently she talks about me a lot to them. I got a hug from her grandma, even. Hehe. I talked a bit with her mom, and then kind of stood to the side for the rest of the time. My name is fading on the mural I did with Lookie and Olivia. Which makes me sad. I should just go in there and touch it up. XD

Yeah, now I'm on today? Cool.

I woke up at eleven, really, but I drifted in and out of sleep until one. I did absolutely nothing until quarter to four, which is when I had to go into work.

It was a crazy day today. I was cut table again - thank the Air - but we had a 70 pie order, as well as a smaller order for the school, and all the customer orders. And time orders stuck in there as well. I thought Ralph had told me that the 70 pie order was cut into six's, but apparently I was wrong. I had to go back and cut all the slices I cut in half to make the regular 12 slices the large pizzas have. I think I only got to about fifteen. Nate actually asked me if he could help me out, but he got pulled out on a delivery after my first telling him that I should have everything under control. When he left, that's when I got overwhelmed. I had Galya cut up most of the other pizzas. Though she got caught up with other things. So when Nate came back from his delivery, I turned around and asked him if he wouldn't cut up the pizzas Galya didn't get to. He was so fucking nice today.

At one point, I turned around and he was just staring through the heat rack again. I'll admit: I jumped. He was so very quiet and sneaky today. Another time, I turned around to put a pizza in a box and he was standing right smack dab beside me. And then there were the times where I just ended up watching him. He was flipping his hat on his head today and was positively delighted when the hat actually stuck there. He also drummed his hands on his legs again. So I watched his hands. And he was looking right back at me again. I'm pretty sure my face blushed. And then he was doing pushups against the sink and I just had to ask what he was doing.

I need to stop filing these interactions away and remembering them so much. I need to stop. I really do.

Oh, so ... I close this weekend, right? I was closing with Matt on Saturday, which meant I would have probably stayed at the shop until one or two in the morning, and with John on Sunday. Which means that I can talk to him about what the hell's going on with managing between the two of us. He just wants to make money, so I'm hoping I can convince him to let me do most of the managing. XD But, I walked into work today, and apparently Nate and Matt switched shifts on Saturday. Which means I'm now closing with Nate. I was dumbstruck. Openly not straight in the head in front of Wes. I'm pretty sure he knows about this crush I've had on Nate for the past few months.

I close with Nate tomorrow, man. With Nate. It's just going to be me ... and him. Alone. In the shop. Holy fucking fuck.

I know nothing's going to happen, but still. It's been a long, long time since we've been alone together. The last time was before I told him that I liked him.

And, I have a date with Wes (Dread Pirate Roberts Wes, not boss Wes) before work tomorrow. We're going to see The Hobbit. And I'm going out with Kyra before work on Sunday to hang out and catch up. It's been absolutely WAY too long since we've hung out. I always meant to text her, too. I have no idea why I never did. And I'm meeting up with AJ after work on Sunday, I guess. Oh fucking dear. What is my life? I don't even know.

And then I close with Jake next Saturday. Which is going to be interesting. We've been getting along handsomly lately. But I dunno what it's going to be like closing with him. Me as his manager. Oh good golly.

Yeah, so ... that's about all I have the competence for anymore. I really need to go to bed.

SONG OF THE DAY: Well, I forgot. Something by Avenged Sevenfold.