Hatin' Too

Besides when I got home earlier this morning, I have only been home for about a total of three hours since I left for school Wednesday morning. I went to work straight after school Wednesday, came home to quickly take care of school shit, went back to Classic for a bit, went to Nicole's house, carpooled to school ... among other things.

I don't remember what I described in the last journal of Nicole's camp out, but I did write a note down in my phone:

Nicole asked me, "What is your hand doing here?"

"It's spooning," I answered confidently. It isn't hidden that I'm close to Jess. Like, she's the one that allows me to be more open with affection. Spooning is one of those things. Plus, she's a lesbian and just brings light to all the girls available. It's hard to think I'm straight around her. Actually, I haven't thought that I was straight for a few years now. I still like the guys, and tend to gravitate toward them more, but I think I could do shit with girls.

Anyway.

School was interesting. I forgot that I had a bunch of shit in my locker yet, so I had to gather up that stuff and take it along with me. I carpooled with Nicole to school, so I didn't have my own vehicle to haphazardly dump everything inside.

Calculus was pretty much a party. Mr. Scott allowed students to bring in pancake mix, and most of everyone had pancakes. I already had a donut at Nicole's house that morning, so I wasn't all that interested. Once everyone was fed, we played Sparkle or Sporkle or whatever that online quiz game thing is called. I had Mr. Scott pull up the bone anatomy one, and I was able to get nearly everything. I felt pretty proud.

While I was allowed to pretty much do as I will in that class, I wrote up the critique and note to the underclassmen stuff for Autumn. I don't really know if that was necessary anymore. I checked on Powerschool is second hour, and I had already received an A+ for doing nothing. Whatever.

Before I settled down in Programming, I ran downstairs and gave the letters to Mrs. Angus to give to Autumn. There were a lot of people I didn't expect I had to push through. I didn't think people really used that stairwell. Guess people are getting smarter. If only.

In Programming I was able to finish my user control game, and I had some fun playing with it, too. I turned it in and then started working on the journal I started yesterday (rather abrupt cut off, huh?), but I didn't work on the final. I asked Mr. Romeo if I could turn it in a little later, and he said that was fine. So, I'm out of school, but I still have school work that needs gettin' done. I don't much see that final getting finished soon, though. I just don't feel like it now. I finally get some downtime.

A few minutes before the bell was supposed to ring, Mr. Moran excused the seniors over the intercom. There was a celebration. Walking through the hallways, I walked through glittery, confetti, silly string ... a lot of whooping seniors. It was uplifting.

I was also able to get a grad party invite to Mr. Stolkey and Mrs. Marsh. Too bad I can't get a hold of Mr. Maddox. Why is it that my English teachers were some of the most influential teachers I've ever had? Maybe because they inspire me the most. I dunno. I also invited Autumn, Frau Z, and Mrs. Wells, though. Those three aren't English teachers, but an art teacher, German teacher, and a science teacher respectively.

The cookout wasn't that great. People ate all the watermelon before I could get to it. I hugged a lot of people. Erich gives awesome hugs, by the way. I was suddenly swooped up in bowling plans with Nicole, Jess, and a bunch of other people. I grabbed my stuff and tagged along. Carpooling, once again.

For some stupid reason, everyone bought five games. Apparently no one has really bowled in a while, because bowling games aren't that exciting and they last longer than people think. We ended up playing only two games. I think I got fifty points on each of those games. So I haven't played in a while. Bite me.

Afterwards, Friedboy dropped me off at Nicole's house so that I could pick up a bathing suit at my house. I quickly found the suit, got changed, took care of the rabbits, and completely forgot everything everyone told me about picking me up again.

I was on empty. Wednesday, when I was coming home from school, the light came on. Then I let Kevin borrow my car for a delivery. ... don't tell my parents that. I haven't really ever seen him drive, though, so I don't know. I still have work this weekend, though, and I didn't want to have to call work and tell Jake or Wes to send someone out to get me because I ran out of gas.

I waited for a half hour at the end of my driveway, but no one showed up. So I hiked back up to the house, grabbed my keys, and went to Jess's house alone. I drove around, absolutely blindly and stupidly, trying to find her pool. It's a community pool, for Thorton Farms, so it wasn't at Jess's house. I already knew that she was swimming already. I was calling her over and over again to figure out what the hell was going on.

Although I wandered around for a while, I figured out where they were. Morris let me in, and I more or less jumped right in. Only Jess, Morris, Kimber and Julie were there yet.

Unfortunately, Friedboy came along.

I'm so fucking sick of this kid. I want him to leave me the fuck alone. I tolerated him for the past four years, but now that we're out of school, I won't. If he continues to fucking tag along with everything I do, I'm going to ask a favor of Jake and tell him to trash the guy for me. I think I told Julie that if he bugs her, I'll call Jake up for her, too. The guy needs a wake up call. He's ... stalked me enough. And enough of my friends.

So when he came along, he didn't wear swimming trunk. No. What did he wear? Gym shorts. That's bad enough. The fabric is light enough so that it clings. But no. It does get worse. He wore white. We could fucking see everything.

Every. Single. Girl that was there. Is scarred. For. Life.

We didn't even know what to say. Especially since he kept getting out of the pool.

The guy has absolutely nothing to flaunt. He's hairy, fucking annoying, and I was avoiding looking at anything else. He doesn't know how to take a hint, either.

All of us were talking about him in whispers. I don't know if he was oblivious or what. At one point, Kimber and I were talking, and then she noticed that Friedboy was stalking down Julie. Again. "Should I go save her?" she asked me.

I took one look at his position and nodded. "Yeah."

She instantly swam off.

So then later, we met up at Jess's house, and Friedboy left Sonam behind at the pool. He was supposed to be driving her. Fucking idiot had to go back and get her again. It was nice for the rest of us, though, because we had a Friedboy-less moment. He came back, though.

I really should not go into details about this night. I think I will, though. Hopefully I'll finish this journal before I have to go off to work. I need to remember this shit. It's supposed to be the best time of my life, after all.

Everyone got changed upstairs in Jessica's house. I didn't have a change of clothes, so I skipped it. I just slipped my sweats on over my bottoms once they were dry. I think I learned then that Jess wanted me to spend the night. I didn't have diddly squat, but I stayed anyway.

Pretty much told Mom that I was spending the night. Dinner was supplied (Classic Pizza *coughcough* I needed to go there anyway, since I got a date requested off wrong).

"Jess wants me to spend the night so i eat dinner here?" I wrote.

"Just u or lots of girls? Did alex ever show?"

I fucking hate that kid. No, he didn't. I drove the car, Mom.

"Lots of girls," I replied. I left out the fact that the foreign exchange student, New, was staying as well. Morris practically spent the night, too. The guy wouldn't stay off of Julie or keep his shirt on. "He would have eventually i suppose," I added. "I can't be around him anymore." It's the truth.

"Fine, stay the night. But am i ever gonna see u again or is this how it's gonna be? :)" The smilie face disturbs me.

Well, maybe. "Partying! No drugs no alcohol. I ain't my workmates." Sorry guys, but I'm clean. I can hang out with you while you're trashed, though. I love that. As long as they're fun drunks/druggies.

Later, we sat down on Jessica's driveway. Just sat there. We were talking. New freaking wanted food. I told them that since they wanted Classic, they would have to wait until at least five o'clock. My plan was to mooch money off of someone. I would pay them back, so I guess borrow would be a better verb.

Friedboy hadn't changed since the pool, and eventually his clothes did dry. Someone asked him if he had boxers underneath his shorts, but we soon figured out that that was not the case. We had another painful span of time in which we played avoid the eyes. Julie says that she saw everything.

When we went into the house again. Jessica tossed him her brother's underwear and told him to wear them. "Why didn't you just tell me?" he asked.

Why should we have to?

When picking up the pizza, I dropped off Sonam (Friedboy gave me $5 gas money to do it), and brought Kimber with me to the pizzeria.

Really, the only reason she came with me was because she wanted to see Tyler. I talk about the guys I work with a little too much. Lately, especially Tyler. Can't imagine why. His little drunk hug the day before did not help.

When I pulled in, I studied the cars. Gary's smartcar was there, Ralph's truck was there. I parked next to that. Zach's truck was there, and what I assumed was Kevin's car. I pretty much told Kimber this, if I remember correctly.

I walked in, but I didn't just grab the food and leave. No. The first thing I did was walk up to Kevin and exclaim, "I'm free! It was the last day of school!" I don't think he was in the greatest of moods. He didn't hug me. After a little exchange, I turned around and said to Kimby, "This is Kevin." I forgot what I told her about him, but it was happy stuff. Maybe the fact that I'm his bro? lol I dunno. He calls me bro. It makes me happy. I like being happy.

I then turned to Zach, whom was walking in circles. "How're you feeling?"

"Better," he replied. He did sound better, but not his usual.

I asked if I could give him a hug today. "Do you need to give me a hug?"

"No. You need me to give you a hug," I replied. I did get a hug, though. I felt special. I'm not sick right now, muthafuckah! Whatcha gotta say 'bout dat, hey? Total nichts!

Tyler walked in then. "Hi, Tyler!" I exclaimed.

I pretty much fell apart then.

I did mention that I haven't had a real hard crush since fucking Tyler McCarthy. I told Emily about that, and she was like, "Why?" I don't know anymore. Kevin holds him in a high light, but that's Kevin. McCarthy treated me like shit. But me being a stupid ass Freshman didn't take any hints.

This is, like, my second hard and sloppy crush ever. Why have the cards aligned for it to be two Tylers? Of the same graduation year? I have no idea. I don't think asking is a good idea. At least Kitchen talks to me. Teases me. Hugged me. Even though he was drunk when he hugged me.

He did tell me that he showed the picture I drew of him to his family and said that they liked it. I think I blushed hard then and it didn't go away. Zach wanted to know if he had the picture with him, and I didn't have it on my phone either. Oh wait! I can facebook the picture to him. *goes off to do that*

Alright. So I did. I hope none of the guys I work with think I'm too much of a bug. That's one of my biggest social fears. Someone thinks I'm too fucking annoying (like Friedboy) but doesn't have the guts to tell me. Although fortunately the guys I work with are typically quite open with what they think. Maybe not Tyler or Nate as much as anyone else, but at least Tyler will tell you what you want to know when you ask.

I had to sign the credit card slip for Jessica's mom, and had the key in the ignition when Kimber reminded me that I came here for reasons other than to pick up the pizzas (and socialize).

"Oh shit!"

Turning off the car again, I stalked back into the building, updated the days I needed requested off. I think I went out and came back in again when I realized that I didn't have any money besides what was in my wallet and what Friedboy gave me to fill up my car. I hate driving when the light comes on.

"All I have is my wrap," Tyler told me. Zach didn't have anything. Kevin led me on in thinking that he could help me out, but when I accepted his offer, he essentially said, "Fuck it. I ain't doing that." Bitch. "You can ask Wes," he told me.

"He'll make me pay interest," I more or less whined.

"All I have is my wrap," Tyler repeated. I swear the guy said that a few times. I tried calling him out on it, but it turns out I was in the wrong. Kimby took Tyler's side.

Finally, without any extra money, we were back on the road.

"So what did ya think?" I asked Kim. She confirmed that my crush was legit. He's cute. D'yeah. She also explained her reaction when Zach more or less took off his shirt to show (I think it was Tyler) poison ivy marks on his stomach. The guy looks nice, okay? I work with a lot of hot guys. Kevin's the same way. I also  grabbed his arm for some reason or another while maneuvering around the building, and I'd be surprised if he had any fat on him. Wiry muscle. Kevin's my bro, though. And he has a cute ass girlfriend. They're adorable together.

Amy had us pick up extra clothes for her on the way back (she lives right on Forrest street, so it wasn't that bad) because we dumped her into the pool when she was adamant against it. Chat left them on her doorstep. It took me a while to trust the tiny pile of clothes, each article in their own plastic baggy.

I went to put the $19 I had into my car at the PA station. I was stared at. Especially since all I had for a top was my bating suit. It covers most of me, but it's very form-fitting. An hour later, we were back at Jess's house. We devoured all the food.

We hung out in Jess's room for a while. The Alexes went to get wood to chop up for a "bon" fire, and that took them a long time. We were glad to be rid of them both. We shooed New away from choosing the music, put on some dance intense stuff, and we had fun. Especially me and Julie.

So it turns out, I can shake my ass. At some point Jess came up behind me and started grinding. I'll admit that that's the first time I ever grinded with anyone. It's Jessica, but still.

The Alexes sucked with cutting wood, but that was okay.

Eventually we did get a fire going, but we never really hung around the fire. Amy attacked Friedboy at some point and pinned him down. Morris tried choking Friedboy out. I wouldn't have minded.

Nicole and Laura showed up as it was getting dark. I practically tackled Laura when I saw her. I only get to see her about once a year anyway. She goes to the Washtenaw high school bullshit. After they arrived, we started the truth or dare. No one can ever come up with anything different. Jessica admitted she wanted to pull out her smokes, but because the "innocent" were there, she couldn't. New could get deported and Friedboy is a snitch, she said. Yeah, pretty much.

The truths and dares got dirty. Although I was asked, after New started going through the app, what my most romantic moment was with Friedboy. My face went absolutely blank, my posture rigid. I said nothing.

That left me in a sour mood for a while, but I let my mind wander. Amy and Jessica tried their best to cheer me up.

Finally, Friedman did leave. That helped lighten the mood a lot, but Morris was still there and trying his damnest to hit on Julie. Jessica got over protective of her, and snapped at him to move his hands once. New using her ass as a pillow is one thing (Jessica and Julie suspect he's gay, I don't want to support an opinion). New is like a dog when it comes to snuggling up. Morris ... no.

And since he was a neighbor, the guy wouldn't leave. He left a while, but came back. Jessica texted me before he left the first time to tell him to leave. I was like, wtf? Why me? I'm not nice, but that's just rude. I showed the text to Amy and Julie, and I thought Morris caught sight of it as well. Except he came back, so I don't think he did.

After the guys were gone, Julie told me she'd teach me how to dance dirty. We turned on the music again (me submitting a dubstep song every now and again), and we danced. She showed me various things, but she was rather shy when the three of us watched her. It wasn't until we were listening to "Strip" that she actually started pulling up her shirt.

I don't even ...

I was already ... and then ... it was fucking hot. I ducked my head between my knees and couldn't function for a bit. I told Jess earlier I was a good bro, but I think I broke it there. I tried, but I couldn't hold myself together. Damn that girl. She has a nice body and some nice moves.

She told me she could teach me how to pole dance. I think I might take her up on that offer.

After a while, we were off on our energy levels (me off my sugar high), and we all cuddled down again. Jess was trying to get me to do the "boom boom" with Amy, but when I actually got to the physical flirting, I chased her off. Jess and Julie figured out that Amy felt pressured and blahblahblah. She didn't think she could actually do it. Quite frankly, I was acting on a bluff myself. Damn, I guess I can act.

We got Amy back after I tracked her through the house and talked to her. We snuggled up again and got to talking about stuff. Teachers, good ones, best times, etc. I fell asleep first, I think. I didn't care.

The following morning, I was about to leave, when Jessica's mother stopped me. She asked me if I wasn't going to eat breakfast. I wasn't planning on it until she tempted me with french toast. I climbed right back into the room. I don't think I've had so much to eat for breakfast before in my life. So far, that's all I've had today and I still feel fine.

I did have to leave, though. I took a shower almost immediately upon coming home, took care of the rabbits, and have pretty much been typing this journal on and off ever since. I have to go to work in twenty minutes. As of where I'm at in time right now.

I also took a bike ride. I hopped on my bike to avoid eating lunch, checked the mail, but I wanted to do more. I didn't feel like jogging because I had just taken a shower. So I told Mom I was going biking, quickly left before Joe could convince my parents that he should be able to go along, and pretty much killed myself.

I'm so out of shape! I was only about a quarter mile down the road when I started to feel the burn. A half mile after that, when I reached the little hill, I could barely make it up. It didn't help that most of the road is loose gravel now, but I should be able to power through that without having to stand up on my pedals.

Then, instead of riding the road down the huge hill before the railroad tracks, I turned onto beach and rode that until the end. I stopped to watch the horses for a while and played a scene out through my head. I was two miles away from home, and freakin' out of shape.

But I did get home. I need to bike more now. And run. And just get back into shape. I miss being able to see my abs. I mean, you can when I haven't eaten much throughout the day, or when I just wake up from the morning, but I don't feel like getting into that. I'm skinny. Proud of it.

Now that school is out, I will get back into shape. I'll run, I'll bike, I'll do metcons. I'll have fun. And practice field hockey for the hell of it.

SONG OF THE DAY: Everywhere I Go ~ Hollywood Undead